Speaker 1 (0s): This is Bruce Friedman of Adult Site Broker and welcome to Adult Site Broker Talk, where every week we interview one of the movers and shakers of the adult industry, and we discuss what's going on in our business. Plus we give you a tip on buying and selling websites this week. This week we'll be speaking with Kole Snodgrass of Full Swap Radio.
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Now let's feature our property the week that's for sale at adult site broker, we're proud to present a one of a kind unique and legendary site. It's a pro amateur ethnic reality site founded all the way back in 2005. The site is styled after popular late night variety shows like the tonight show viewers never know what to expect with a variety of different performers from brand new amateur talents to famous porn stars. There is no other website, quite like it.
The site continues to grow and expand with no major competitors in this niche. What makes it unique is their 100% original content that has uncensored and unscripted reality TV style scenes. They let the performers be themselves while having fun filming the video trailers are short web episodes that engage the viewers and are immensely popular online. Almost all the traffic is organic with some affiliate traffic. It runs on a custom built script, which has been maintained and updated.
The site gets about 20 joins and 40 rebuilds a day. It's ranked number 16 in the USA on X videos, only $1.4 million. Now time for this week's interview. My guest today, an adult site broker talk is Cole Snodgrass of full swap radio Cole. Thanks for being with us today on adult site. Broker talk,
Speaker 2 (2m 53s): Thanks so much for having me. I really appreciate it.
Speaker 1 (2m 56s): I appreciate your time now, Cole and miss Amanda, like to joke, they are the longest one night stand you're ever gonna meet. They met in college in 1992. You're young. You guessed it on a one night stand and they've been together ever since they've been in the lifestyle for five years. During those five years, they witnessed a gradual change with more lifestyle people starting Facebook groups. It seemed like more cliques were forming. It felt like if you weren't one of the cool kids, then your experience in the lifestyle lifestyle suffered.
They also witnessed how hard it was for new couples and individuals to be accepted with established groups and clubs. So in March of 2017, crazy Cosmo was born. Did I say that? Right? Like the song you did. Okay, good, good. That a lot of phonetic stuff in, in this script also born that day was the concept of swinging with attitude. Change is never easy and this change has been no different since that first night crazy Kaba has grown to include eight different Facebook pages, multiple chat groups, a radio showed called crazy truth, and that's with a K and SBAs rans podcast, full swap shop merchandise store and their online radio station, full swap radio.
Their podcasts have a dedicated audience and now have over 85,000 followers. Their goal is to push for a safer, more inclusive lifestyle for everyone. So did you like your commercial Cole?
Speaker 2 (4m 27s): I did. That was awesome.
Speaker 1 (4m 28s): I, I do
Speaker 2 (4m 29s): Love best. I, that was great.
Speaker 1 (4m 30s): I do my best. So Cole, what caused you to go from lifestyle participant to creating your own company?
Speaker 2 (4m 39s): I'm a, I'm a realist. And at the time I was, I was in the professional real world. I was a car salesman and in a car business. And so my time was exceedingly valuable. Yeah. And what would happen is we would go to these events. We would go to meet and greets and go to things. And there was just so much shenanigan, so much fluff, so much clickiness. It was like, this is, this is, people are making this way too difficult.
And it was just like, you know what? I'm, I'm a person that I'm a doer. I see something let's solve it. And I, a lot of people can tell you the stories of me going, you know, if a guy was smart, he would start his own page. And finally just reached that boiling point where it was like, you know what? This is, this is stupid. This, this is not the way this should be. And on the odds of March, we started crazy CA I miss Amanda woke up the next morning and went, I'm an admin of what?
And way we went.
Speaker 1 (5m 41s): Yeah. Interesting. So you weren't really in the lifestyle too long before you did this, right?
Speaker 2 (5m 49s): Not really. I mean, we, we, we, we'd only been in about five years and, and at that point, so we had seen things and we had gotten,
Speaker 1 (5m 56s): So you had been in it five years before you started it.
Speaker 2 (5m 59s): Right.
Speaker 1 (5m 60s): Okay. Okay. Got it.
Speaker 2 (6m 2s): So, but we were still, you know, anytime you say, you think you've seen it all experienced it all, you'll be proven wrong. And, and really right. Even five years in is still kind of newbies to a degree, but sure. We had seen this and we'd seen enough. And it was like, you could still, you knew what it felt like to be new. We were still new enough, those feelings of trying to break in those circles and those clicks and those groups, we could see what could be. And I, I could see how much better it could be and what the Midwest was lacking.
And so the joke was that I just wanted to take over the world and a way we went and we've never looked back
Speaker 1 (6m 39s): Now, you're in Nebraska of all places. It's, you know, I mean, maybe it's a being, being a California, and now I live in Thailand. So that's all screwed up. But talk about preconceptions. If you think about, think about the adult industry, think about the lifestyle, and then you think about Nebraska. So how, how do those mesh
Speaker 2 (7m 5s): Well, and, and honestly, that's, they didn't, and, and that was really part of the problem is that, you know, the, the Midwest is so such a flyover, flyover states, Nebraska is a flyover state. And so you didn't hear there wasn't
Speaker 1 (7m 22s): You said, you said it. I didn't.
Speaker 2 (7m 24s): Yeah. Yep. Trust me. I've apologized many times for the things I've said about states, but we didn't hear about the big events on the coast cuz people didn't, people don't understand that demographically, a state like Nebraska, we have the most billionaires of any state in the union. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (7m 43s): You've
Speaker 2 (7m 43s): Got a lot, you know, our people, they may buy combines, but they pay a million dollars in cash for those combines. And when they're not farming, they're going cruises and all kinds of stuff. So we were kind of just left in the lurch and sure. Part of what we, what I, what we have done is we have built the fact that we're not flyover anymore. You're not gonna get through the Midwest without seeing us.
Speaker 1 (8m 10s): Yeah. And
Speaker 2 (8m 11s): Our events. And we laugh all the time that if we had lived on the east or the west coast, I'd probably be closer to my goal of taking over the world actually.
Speaker 1 (8m 24s): So tell me about the podcast. Actually, you got more than one, but who have been some of your favorite guests so far and why?
Speaker 2 (8m 33s): You know, so the podcast, there's so many different types of shows out there. And as we've looked at, we, we wanted, we made every mistake you could make as, as a new couple in the lifestyle, of course. And so we wanted our show to be one that was really an added value. And to be honest with you, we really haven't, we haven't done done very many interviews, had to interview people on our show because our show has been completely listener driven.
So we answer questions from our that we get sent to us, emailed into us, mailed into us, come to us on our, some of our Facebook groups. And it's been a, an incredible experience because when you get the response from the folks that ask you the questions, they listen to the show and they go, you've changed my life.
Speaker 1 (9m 25s): Hmm.
Speaker 2 (9m 26s): That is without a doubt at just a, a tremendous feeling. And, and you know, our, show's not the biggest show out there. I'm sure we could be bigger if we told more sex stories and did some other things. That's just not our gig. We try to keep it pretty. I can be opinionated. People who know me will find that hard to believe. So we try, we try to keep that separate. And that's where, that's where then SBAs rants came up, which is my own show where I have no adult supervision. And again, we're, I'm, I'm tackling issues in the lifestyle.
And when we have people come up and go, wow, I felt like this show was, this episode was written specifically for me. And I'm really gonna change, or I've made changes because of it. That's the greatest feeling in the world.
Speaker 1 (10m 10s): Yeah. Definitely with the call in format and sorry for my ignorance, obviously I, I, I, I haven't listened, but so how has that gone?
Speaker 2 (10m 22s): So I I'm gonna backtrack cuz it ties in with the whole thing. There's always a method to my madness, our, our logos. And you'll, you'll see our logos on everything has the middle finger that's hence the, the swinging with an attitude. And it was, it was really funny when we started our show. When we first started out, anytime you do something different, you attract haters. It is what it is. Oh sure. And, and when you, you rock the status quo, you're gonna have haters. And of course we start all, every one of our podcasts, pod podcasts, excuse me, start off with me going, Hey, you crazy motherfuckers, welcome to another edition of crazy truth.
We were getting called. You can go back several years and find on Twitter where people were calling us shock jocks. You can't say those things. You can't be that's insulting. What it was is that let's face it. We've all been in situations where we're just fed up tired, pissed off, whatever you wanna say. And we just kind of wanna say bucket it. I mean, it's a horrible way to put it, but it, you know,
Speaker 1 (11m 25s): No, it's the way it is. That's that's my vocabulary.
Speaker 2 (11m 29s): Yeah. Well it, it really is. And, and sometimes, you know, you, flowery language is beautiful, but sometimes you have to break things down to the most basic common denominator. And what we found was with the show and, and with everything we've done is the people we were told on a national level, this will never fly, blah, blah, blah. What we found is the people just needed a pied Piper. They needed somebody who was willing to stand in front of the crowd and go, don't be afraid. Follow me.
Let's go stand your ground. And, and, and, and that's been with the show with, with everything we've resisted the urges to, to switch to more of a, I'll call it a penthouse forum concept. You know, we've just, we blaze our own trail and that's, everybody wants to do that. They need somebody that can say the things that they want to say. Sure. But maybe they don't have the courage to say or don't feel like they can say, and that's what we come in.
Speaker 1 (12m 27s): Sure. So, so far, what do you feel your biggest accomplishment with your business is in the lifestyle?
Speaker 2 (12m 35s): Really? Honestly, I think Ms. Mann and I both feel like it, it's just the, the amount of, of impact we have had on people's lives. Every single day. We are honored and privileged to get emails from people, thanking us for talking about the things that, the true questions that they had or talking about the things nobody else has giving them honest advice, whether it's what they want to hear sometimes or not.
We have that interaction has been tremendous. And really I'll tell you the number one, the number one. And this goes with our episode, best episode that we've done still our most popular we had, I had a testicular cancer and it was, it was, it was a weird situation. I was fine on one Sunday. And on the following Saturday, I was having a testicle removed
Speaker 1 (13m 33s): For shit.
Speaker 2 (13m 34s): And it was case number 121 in the world ever. My, my nut is famous. Boom, the, the Sunday after
Speaker 1 (13m 44s): I, you got that's what you got that going for you.
Speaker 2 (13m 46s): Yeah. Yeah. And I'm totally fine. And, and, but the Sunday, after the, after we had it removed on Saturday, the following day, we recorded a show and we did a couple of shows about men's health and, and about, Hey, you know, being tested. My urologist is now a fan of our show. We still have people come up and say, you know, I, I had my cuz testicular cancers generally at a younger man's situation, walk up and say, Hey, we've had, we had our kids listen to it.
Our sons about checking themselves and other men have come and said, Hey, we've went in now and got checked. And it saved me. They, they found prostate cancer early because of it, when you can do that is a business and have fun. That's a beautiful thing.
Speaker 1 (14m 33s): Yeah, no, it definitely is. It definitely is. And I'm, I'm sure glad you're okay. Now you initially had some frustrations about the lifestyle. Do you think, do you think things have gotten better or have they gotten worse?
Speaker 2 (14m 48s): I truly, we feel like it, it it's, they're moving in the right direction. I think there are some areas that are just going to require continuous preaching, basically continuous revisiting. I think there are things that, that we can all do as members of the community in the lifestyle and as participants to make it better. But I, but I think it takes work. And I think that we have to continuously be diligent in our efforts to achieve those goals.
I mean, we, we pushed things like consent. We, we pushed, we've teamed up with different people like nightcaps, for example, for safety at parties to, to stop this damn spiking of drinks that happens at events, you know, we push security at our events. Sure. A raising of the bar of what the expectation is in the lifestyle is necessary. It's, it's starting to happen slowly. There's a long way to go. Right. And, and, and I have to put in there right now with the current environment of the world that we live in.
I think that it is important that we help the rest of the world, understand the difference between the stereotypical swingers, which is obviously false and narrative, as we all know, right. To what really is the lifestyle and, and part of that's how we behave and what we do. So I think it's moving in the right direction, but it's, it's a constant effort and there's no, there's not an end date, if that makes sense.
Speaker 1 (16m 24s): Yeah, totally. Now it, it seems from our conversations, like you're looking at getting both lifestyle and adult businesses to advertise as well as mainstream companies. Why is that?
Speaker 2 (16m 37s): Well, so our philosophy, okay. So obviously being in Nebraska, I grew up in Omaha, which is Warren buffet. The Oracle of Omaha lives in Nebraska. And, and so I've been surrounded by that concept, the Berkshire Hathaway concept, my entire life. And, and, and quite honestly, there's a, there's a misnomer out there that adult businesses or lifestyle businesses need to operate under some sort of unique system because they're adult businesses. And the reality of it is, is that until adult businesses are listed in the top 100 and top 50 corporations of the world, I think the regular business model actually is, is very effective and needs to be applied.
Right? I am firm believer that when you look at the demographics of the lifestyle of the swinging community, it is a company's dream target audience, 35 to 55, $180,000, average household income income. They own their own homes. You know, this is a target market. Yes. But our job is we have to educate them that being the, the vanilla world to let them know that, Hey, look, just because our hobby is different, your hobby might be golf.
My hobby might be a little bit different. You know what? I still buy grills. I still wear jeans. I still sure we're still people. And, and I truly believe as we break that barrier down and, and we show vanilla manufacturers and vanilla companies, the value of advertising and working with adult companies, quality adult companies, it's going to open up more sponsorship dollars for events,
Speaker 1 (18m 19s): Right?
Speaker 2 (18m 20s): I mean, let's face it, you know, at, at this point in time, there's only so many lifestyle companies that can sponsor big lifestyle events or B sponsors. There's a limited amount of dollars, but sure. If all of a sudden you can open up and Coca-Cola, for example, could be a sponsor. Well, that's gonna improve the quality of the lifestyle.
Speaker 1 (18m 38s): And
Speaker 2 (18m 38s): I just think it will, it will cause the businesses within the lifestyle to raise their games, to meet the expectations of the regular corporate America as well.
Speaker 1 (18m 47s): Yeah. And, you know, corporate America has, has avoided the adult industry, like the plague and including the lifestyle, Obviously the recent barrage of right wing religious attacks on adult with the help of media outlets. Like the New York times was subscription. I canceled when they went after mine geek. Yep.
You know, I mean, I vote with my money. What can I say? But it's interesting because if you would asked 20 years ago, if I ever thought that mainstream companies would invest dollars in the L G B T community, which is now L G T Q plus, I would've said, you're crazy now they, can't not, I wonder what it's gonna take to get them to invest in adult.
Speaker 2 (19m 47s): Well, and you know, and, and I think that's a, I think you, you, you put an interesting question there. And I, I think that just like every other aspect of the lifestyle, it's about education. If, if we can show an adult or vanilla company, let let's say a bar, for example, if we can go and show that that bar, how, Hey, look, people are gonna walk in with S screaming, worse, swingers, worse, swingers, and chase your patrons away. They're not going to come in and try to have sex with every person they see any, any different than any other vanilla person would at a bar, you know?
Right. They're, they're actually gonna be very low key they're whatever, but they'll spend more money and they can actually see, wait a minute, that image that we've seen on TV, that's, that's a stereotype. That's not real
Speaker 1 (20m 35s): Sure. And,
Speaker 2 (20m 36s): And I think as we educate, and the other thing is, I believe with the right wing things going on in the world right now, this, the lifestyle community is going to, to be in need of, of partners. And because at some point in time, the problem with zealots is that they eventually will turn on you too. And we're not, as, we're not as big as at, you know, what do they say, 12 to 15 million lifestyle people in the us.
And you know, we're gonna need companies to go now, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, hold on a second here. We're, we're gonna need partners. And I think that's gonna be very, very important.
Speaker 1 (21m 18s): Now in recent years, it seems the lifestyle is integrated a lot with the rest of the adult industry. Why do you think that is? And do you think there's room for more cooperation between the two?
Speaker 2 (21m 30s): You know, I think that with the, with the improvement in things like cell phones and, and things like that, you know, and, and we do it as well. Miss Amanda has an only fan's account and, and, you know, the ability to, to shoot content, you know, now everybody has a phone. Everybody thinks they're of, you know, they're they're movie makers. So there's the ability to, to produce some of the things are there. And I think people see the potential for the dollar signs to be there. Sure.
I think that there is a lot of room for cooperation and part of it is, you know, the adult community has the adult world and, and, and has a lot of experience and education that I think some of the amateurs, some of the swingers that go, Hey, I wanna do porn. I want to, I wanna do only fans. They can provide a lot of insight going, okay, you need to think about this a little bit and Hey, you need to hear here's the rules you need to follow. I, I almost think it can be like a mentoring process with it.
And, and honestly, I, the return factor is I think that a lot of the people in the, the lifestyle love the opportunity to get to meet their, the let's face it porn is, is, is at lifestyle events. It's obviously part of it, the chance to get, to meet their, the people they're fans of and to talk to 'em. And I just think there's a lot of room there. And I think that if it's done correctly, I think that it can be a great relationship, you know? And, and I also think there's a degree that we need the adult community to be willing, to help educate little miss housewife and hubby that think they're gonna make some extra money and put some dirty videos out there of the, the, the bigger picture.
Right. Because, you know, just because you, you show, you show your body doesn't mean you're gonna be rich overnight. It doesn't work that way. Right. So I, I definitely think they, they can help. And I think a lot of the people in the adult community enjoy the lifestyle and if we can make it so they can attend events and not be mobbed, that they can be just people. Also, I think that's a plus as well.
Speaker 1 (23m 40s): Sure. Now you alluded to Ms. Amanda doing only fans, is that, is that the extent of the adult work she's doing
Speaker 2 (23m 50s): It? It's the starting point she has. She has decided to go ahead and, and, and she wants to do more. And that's something that we're, that we're working on. We're learning. It's, it's funny because, you know, we talk about, we believe there's a window, you know, we're both, I just turned, I turned 50 in a month and she's 51. And she's like, you know, there you go. There's a, there's a window here. And, and part of it is the confidence, you know, 20 years ago there, if you, I would've bet every penny I ever would have in my life that there's no way she would ever do adult anything, but the, the lifestyle and the confidence and, and she enjoys it.
That's, it's a boost. Her, it's a, she enjoys it. And quite honestly, it's something that a lot of our, our folks really wanna see. And so we're, we're about please in the crowds and she's having a good time, so we wanna keep it going. And, and we're talking to some folks on the adult side that can kind of help guide us because there's a whole lot of things we don't know, but we're trying to learn and things that we can bring back to help the other people in the Midwest, you know, on the coast, there's there, there's groups meeting, Hey, let's put content together and whatever the Midwest doesn't have that.
And so we're as SVA. We're trying to create that for them, but we wanna be able to do it in a way that we can make sure that we help people do it the right way that they're safe and they're smart and, and whatever. So sure. We're learning with everybody else. And we're having a lot of fun in the process.
Speaker 1 (25m 12s): There's a website, adult model mentors that deals with a lot of that subject matter that she should take a look at. And you guys should probably partner with, if, if a lot of your people are, are starting to get into the only fans type of site. So certainly I can make that introduction for you. I would love that the owner, the owners have been on, on the podcast before go figure, right. So why did you decide to start the radio station?
And how's it going so far?
Speaker 2 (25m 47s): There is it's the, the basic concept. One person yelling is loud. 50 people yelling. The same thing is louder. And there is when you look into the adult alternative and, and sex positive lifestyles in, in that genre on the podcast, there's a lot of noise, you know, there's, there's literally hundreds of podcasts. Some of them, a lot of them are folks that are doing as hobbies. Some are taking
Speaker 1 (26m 15s): More like more like hundreds of thousands actually. Yeah. Not millions.
Speaker 2 (26m 20s): Yeah. And, and you get lost. And again, we did everything you could do wrong when we started our podcast also. So I mean, you know, we, we learned the hard way, but I wanted to have a place that all of us were yelling the same thing together. But I also wanted something because again, education is a huge aspect for us. I have said for years and years, I believe that all the different parts of the lifestyle BDSM, the gangsters, naturalists, you know, swingers, polyamory, we're all on the same tree.
We're just different branches. And really, there's not that much difference between us. We feel like there's until we start communicating and talking and come to find out, there's a lot of similarities. Sure. I wanted a place that people could go and listen. And if they had interest in, in poly, they could listen to shows about poly. They had swingers, you know, we have, or erotica or, or whatever the case may be. And that was where the radio station came in. Sure. In, in a perfect world, I would love someday to take.
And because I'm old. So, you know, downloads, my kids had to explain, but you're
Speaker 1 (27m 30s): Not.
Speaker 2 (27m 33s): I feel like my kids remind kids.
Speaker 1 (27m 34s): I'm 65 in October, bro. So
Speaker 2 (27m 40s): Now I can't use I'm old stop man though. No,
Speaker 1 (27m 43s): You can't sorry.
Speaker 2 (27m 44s): My, my kid, my kid, you thought I was 110. They're like, dad, why are you touching a computer? Yeah. But you know, we have found a lot of people, Hey, you know, their favorite show. They, they love our show. Well, then they have stuck around and they listened to what's on before and after. And all of a sudden they're finding, Hey, here's this show. I never knew anything about, well, you know what? I have interest in cut holding. Like, that's an example. You know, we have green cut holds podcast on there, or, you know, learn more about poly. So in the grand scheme of things, the perfect world is someday to take.
And you, instead of needing pod bean and, and the rest of 'em, that you're gonna be able to go and find everything you want. And you're gonna wanna have the radio station going all day long. That's the goal we threw into the mix. We have vanilla Sunday. So our shows on Sundays are just regular shows.
Speaker 1 (28m 35s): Hmm.
Speaker 2 (28m 35s): And we did that such
Speaker 1 (28m 37s): As such as
Speaker 2 (28m 39s): The traveler barefoot traveler is on there. We have malice is on there. We have no show those five guys. That's, that's awesome. Just we have everything from a health wellness show, travel show, sports show, crime mystery show, a SIM movie reviewing show, just regular shows.
Speaker 1 (29m 1s): Sure.
Speaker 2 (29m 3s): And, and again, it, it takes courage for some of those shows to come on this station, but it's again, to prove that point of, Hey, look,
Speaker 1 (29m 12s): Crossover. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (29m 14s): We're all still people,
Speaker 1 (29m 15s): Right? Sure. Absolutely. Do you ever feel like Kaba Inc has too many moving parts? You like laughs.
Speaker 2 (29m 26s): It is a great time that you asked me that question because we have our crazy summer nights event coming up August 5th through the seventh, which is my birthday weekend and one of our three big national events. So yes, There are times we've got our fingers in an awful lot of, of different places and it can, it can seem overwhelming. Right. And yet when I've looked at and we've talked about, you know, where do we wanna pull back? There's nowhere that I want to, we wanna pull out of.
And so now the focus has been more on how we can grow the internal organization to better handle the growth of all the external components. Right. And which is a challenge it's, I'm kind of a control freak. So that's a learning curve a little bit for me, but we just, you
Speaker 1 (30m 18s): Know it.
Speaker 2 (30m 19s): Yeah. Yeah. I'm willing to embed it. And if I'm not willing to admit it, Amanda, after 30 years will happily tell it to me. Yes. But there's just, there's not a place that we go, you know, we don't enjoy doing this aspect anymore. So the biggest thing I get now is I do get the miss. Amanda actually owns CAS bank. She's the, she's the CEO of the company. So I, I am on a leash a little bit that if I come up with other things I do now have to, I'm not allowed to just surprise her with that.
I do now have to check it with her before I make announcements of, oh, by the way,
Speaker 1 (30m 55s): Gotta check with the head office. Good job. Good job. Keep, keep some marriage going. Right. Very much so. And I should give the standard, disclaimer, since you mentioned event an event in August that will have passed by the time this runs, but that's okay. I'm sure. I'm sure it will go well. So be besides the song, what does Kaba mean or stand for?
Speaker 2 (31m 19s): So we, we, for a long time, we wouldn't tell anybody. And the way that the, the name came about, the way crazy Kaba came about is we were, we had used Kaba as our username when we first got in the lifestyle for like some of the websites we were on. Right. And we would go to party in an Iowa and they're like, oh, the crazy couple from Nebraska's coming. That's crazy
Speaker 1 (31m 44s): Camo again. I'm just, I'm just, I'm just trying to get this visual of, of, of lifestyle parties in Iowa. But anyway, go ahead.
Speaker 2 (31m 52s): So the funny thing is we, we ran contests for years. We wouldn't tell anybody for years what camo meant, just, and, and the guess is that people had, were, were amazing. But actually what Kaba means, Kaba stands for Cole, Amanda, Sebastian bra, and Holden. So it's actually us and our kids.
Speaker 1 (32m 14s): Nice. So
Speaker 2 (32m 15s): We had used it for our email for years and years before we ever gotten a lifestyle. Right. Our kids are all grown and, and our kids know what we do, but as when they were going through that stage, it was like, okay, well, here's something really important to remember when you're, you know, clicking on websites and whatnot. If it says CSBA, I probably wouldn't open it. Just
Speaker 1 (32m 38s): There you go. And you know, and now that, that brings about a question when you're in the lifestyle, it, it can be kind of sensitive. Sometimes. Has, have you shared this with, with your entire family?
Speaker 2 (32m 55s): Yes, actually. So we are completely out. We're completely out. Okay. Our, our, the way our, our kids found out our oldest one was already had already graduated from high school and our middle one was a senior in high school. And when we first started, we used to cam on, on, on adult friend finder every night, we, every night we cam for we'd have sex for an hour and then talk for three hours. We had a show. It was like a precursor to where we're at now. And then we would shut the computer down at night. Well, it didn't shut down one night.
So the next morning our middle one got up to go to school to check his Facebook and put up in there as a picture of his mom. You couldn't see her head, but you could see a butterfly tattoo that she has, that he designed. It's like time to chat. So for a lot of years they knew whatever. And that was fine. Two years ago, my mom and dad were at our house for Christmas and, and we have a studio in our house and we had kind of blocked off. We just moved and mom started poking around and, and didn't say much, but we would always go on Christmas morning.
There was a casino in the one. They always did the big buffet things, you know? Yeah. And we were standing in line and all of a sudden we're standing there and my brother and his family are there. And my mom and dad and our kids, and this guy comes running up and she goes, oh my God, it's you guys, it's you? Oh my God. And gives us a big hug. She's a waitress, takes pictures with us and goes away. And so of course my family's looking at us like, you know, and we're just like, you don't really know what to say.
It's like, well, yeah, I think we've met her somewhere. You know, you're just kind of, kind of come excuses. We go and we sit down to eat and all of a sudden she went and told another staff member who was also on our page.
Speaker 1 (34m 45s): Oh, geez. Who
Speaker 2 (34m 46s): Comes running up and asks us to sign some stuff.
Speaker 1 (34m 50s): Oh
Speaker 2 (34m 50s): No. And get pictures with us. And it's like, okay. It's like, be careful. What do you really wanna know? Be careful what you ask. And oh, they kind of wanna know. So we, we kind of danced around the subject a little bit. We didn't explain the magnitude of it. The following month was our crazy winter nights. And it was our largest crazy winter nights that we'd had at that point and had a thousand people. And they had come up, they went up past where the hotel was and there was all these signs and they saw Kaba. And so then it's like, okay, what is going on?
It's like, all right. Time to be just laid all out there. And so we did. And so we just laid it all out there. It's interesting explaining, trying to explain to your parents, you know, polyamory. I mean, there, every stereotype they're hitting, but you know, my brother, my brother he's older. He has questions, but he just kinda, he wants to ask, but he really doesn't every now and then my mom, actually, we she'll ask all the time how the events are going. And she was in the hospital this last year.
My dad had passed away and was in the hospital with broken hip. And we put out on the page and a whole bunch of our members sent her get well cards and Christmas cards. Oh. And my mom is just, she has fallen in love with our group, you know, on I, these people are, and she's really opened her mom.
Speaker 1 (36m 9s): They are. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (36m 10s): Yeah. So we had to tell her, don't tell people, let's not try to cuz you're not gonna explain it quite. Right. So just right. But you know,
Speaker 1 (36m 17s): She has, she has a new family. That's awesome. Yeah. So what's the biggest misunderstanding about the lifestyle to people who don't participate in it,
Speaker 2 (36m 28s): What we find. And it's really funny cuz it's still the, it, it, it hasn't changed. It's that misconception, that one you are, that everything is just a, a, a key party, basically that anytime that you're with anybody else from the lifestyle, you're having sex with them, it doesn't matter who it is. You're going to have sex with all of them. And it's just like, they, they just, they don't understand that that is so far from the truth. I, again, and it's not their fault.
You can't, all they've ever seen is, you know, key parties or, or that type or those stereotype
Speaker 1 (37m 5s): What's things. That's a, that's a, that's not a term I'm familiar with.
Speaker 2 (37m 10s): So know key parties.
Speaker 1 (37m 12s): Yeah.
Speaker 2 (37m 13s): So, so the, the old key parties where they, everybody go to an event and put their house keys or their car keys and a fishbowl. And at the end of the night, the guys would draw keys out. And whoever's keys. You got that's who you went and had sex with. I mean, you know, this is like 70 stuff. You know, this kinda stuff would no more happen to the man on the moon now, But there there's just that people are blown away when they finally ask us. And we tell 'em about things like our Kaba cares program, where, you know, we've given away almost $50,000 to lifestyle families and people in need, they're blown away.
It just doesn't fit because they're like, but you have sex with just anybody and everybody it's like, no, that's, that's not how this works. That's not how any of this works. Right. That's the part that we're, if we can ever get people over that businesses and regular people, the lifestyle, won't be such a scary thing.
Speaker 1 (38m 8s): Yeah. Yeah. Well, I think that, and not being a person who's involved, so I can't speak totally articulate about it, but knowing enough people who are in the lifestyle and knowing people who organize events in the lifestyle, I've got one friend who organizes very high end events in the lifestyle. I, I have enough knowledge to, to say that really more than anything else, they're social events.
Yes. Where people might have sex,
Speaker 2 (38m 46s): That's putting it beautifully because that's exactly what it is that reaches a point that as we age and, and everything else, you know, the, the sex drive changes and, and the whole nine yards. But I can honestly say that for miss Amanda and I, and, and for a lot of people there will reach a point where we won't play anymore.
Speaker 1 (39m 5s): Yeah.
Speaker 2 (39m 6s): But we'll never leave the
Speaker 1 (39m 7s): Lifestyle. And, and by, and by play to, to give people the meaning of that, that means have sex.
Speaker 2 (39m 13s): Right? Yeah. We, we won't, we won't have, we won't have hookups with, with other couples or it would be very, very rare, but we will never leave the lifestyle because the friendships right. And, and that the ability to be relaxed. And there's just, when we talk about community and, and I, and I apologize, cuz this is gonna sound, you know, there's not really a, a pretty way to put it. So I'm gonna just put it in the simplistic terms for, to prove the point is then here's the deal.
If I trust you enough to potentially have sex with my wife And you trust me enough to potentially have sex with your wife, don't you think that our level of trust and relationship in the rest of our lives is probably a little bit more than, than the average people out on the street? Oh yeah. It takes a different thing. So yeah, the way that I, that I show this is there was a couple in a small town in the Midwest they've lived there the whole life. He was paralyzed from a, an accident that he'd had years before he's worked at the same company for day.
She's worked in the company forever and day. He was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. Okay. They did all the typical, small town, small community fundraisers, which is beautiful young people doing big sales selling. T-shirts all of those things that community raised for them somewhere. It was like eight to $900. Okay. We got involved cuz they were on our page and in one weekend we raised $10,000 for them.
Speaker 1 (40m 49s): Wow.
Speaker 2 (40m 50s): That's the difference between community, you know, regular list, life, community, community,
Speaker 1 (40m 58s): Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (40m 59s): A shared bond and, and that
Speaker 1 (41m 0s): Lifestyle, lifestyle community. Yeah. And it's, it's strong. It it's a, it is, it definitely is very family like
Speaker 2 (41m 9s): Yes can be. And, and, and with any family, you know, you have, you have the occasional dysfunction. You have, you have the normal parts of society.
Speaker 1 (41m 17s): Yes.
Speaker 2 (41m 18s): But for the most part, there's just a different level of trust and communication. That's required to be successful in the lifestyle. You know, we had our car one time and, and some friends of ours in the lifestyle, let us loan just a car for three weeks.
Speaker 1 (41m 36s): Geez.
Speaker 2 (41m 37s): I, I mean, that's just the level of, of you know, of relationships, so sure. It's, it's a beautiful thing. It can be
Speaker 1 (41m 45s): Absolutely. Now where do you, Seeba being in five years and where would you like to take it besides, besides rolling the world? Of course.
Speaker 2 (41m 56s): Yeah. Yeah. That, that goal has never went away completely. You know, where I see us and, and is, is to continue to be, I, I, it used to be, I only wanted to see us in front, but my vision has changed. We may be on the fringe. We may be in the middle. We may be in the front, but in five years from now, we will continue to be the loudest voice for positive change, for education, for consent, for testing, for safety and, and, and to a degree.
And this is gonna sound really weird. I, you know, I, I truly believe that we'll be leading that's, that's what I'm all about is to, is continue to be that pied Piper, but we're going to, no matter what, continue to be the thorn in the side that does not allow the lifestyle to become complacent and to go well, yeah, this is probably good enough, right. We have an obligation to take what we've done in the Midwest and take that same concept, that same energy and enthusiasm and, and change and have it spread across the world.
Quite honestly, it definitely from coast to coast. And, and that's really what I think where we'll continue to be. And, and hopefully the things like the radio stations that, that, you know, will be known as that company, 50 years from now, you know, when, when I'm long gone, when they go, those were the ones that, you know, they always pushed education and the lifestyles better because they kept pushing for growth.
Speaker 1 (43m 35s): Absolutely. If you're not growing, you're going backward. Right.
Speaker 2 (43m 39s): That's right. Very much. So. Very much so.
Speaker 1 (43m 42s): Well, Cole, I'd like to thank you for being our guest today and adults, I broker talk and I hope a chance. I will have a chance to do this again soon.
Speaker 2 (43m 49s): Absolutely. Thank you so much for giving us the opportunity to come on and, and talk. It is greatly appreciated. And, and I sincerely enjoyed it.
Speaker 1 (43m 57s): Thank you. My broker tip today is part six of what to do to make your site more valuable for when you decide to sell it later, here's more information on what to give to a potential buyer. Tell them how well has your content been protected from piracy and what steps have you taken to protect your content? Are you using a piracy take down or monitoring service? These are important facts to know what promotional tools do you offer your affiliates, the more tools you offer, the more successful they'll be.
What is your traffic breakdown by country tier one countries like the USA, Canada, the UK, Germany and Australia are the most preferred add in anything else that will add value to the sale of your property that you can think of such as what custom scripts do you use? What content management system software is on the site. Do you use billing or affiliate software like NATS? What's your retention rate? How you retain your members is of the utmost importance. How many joins and rebuilds do you have per day?
Do you buy advertising? And if so, what kind can your content make more money in the D or VOD markets? Or have you already taken advantage of this opportunity? How much did you spend to produce or buy the content that's on your site? What do you believe the content is worth now what's special or different about your website? How is it unique? Make sure and include a list of all of the websites you're selling. In addition to any domains that come along with the sale. Is there anything that adds value to the sale, provide them with any additional information upon request before giving a buyer, any information, have them sign a non-disclosure agreement.
If you use a broker, the NDA will be provided for you. Good brokers. Like, I don't know. Maybe adult site broker have a large resource of potential buyers that are looking for properties just like yours, and they know how to deal with potential buyers. They'll also negotiate the terms of the sale, such as price in any payment terms before closing the sale, find a good escrow service to make sure that both the buyer and the seller are protected. We have those resources. Of course, we'll talk about this subject more next week.
And next week, we'll be speaking with Robert Warren of 2much.net. And that's it for this week's Adult Site Broker Talk. I'd once again like to thank my guest Kole Snodgrass. Talk to you again next week on Adult Site Broker Talk. I'm Bruce Friedman.