0 (7s):This is Bruce Friedman of Adult Site Broker and welcome to Adult Site Broker Talk, where every week we interview one of the movers and shakers of the adult industry, and we discuss what's going on in our business. Plus we give you a tip on buying and selling websites this week. This week we'll be talking with Heather Montgomery of Pleaze Me.
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0 (1m 32s):
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0 (2m 17s):
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1 (2m 43s):
My guest today on adult say broker talk is Heather Montgomery. She is the founder and CEO of please me. And let me spell that out. P L E a Z E M E. Heather. Thanks for being with us today on adult side broker talk.
2 (2m 59s):
Oh my God. So wonderful to be here. Thank you for having me.
1 (3m 1s):
It's nice to have you. Now I'm going to tell people a little bit about you. Heather created please me to challenge the status quo as it relates to the way people treat sex in life, as well as in society, especially for women, she longed for a fun, sexy place to explore and expand her sexual desires without a backlash in her personal and public life. As a single woman, she didn't find it. Montgomery's concept of please me as a tool, tailored to one sexual interest desires and needs latent with diverse resources. Heather has been an entrepreneur and marketing professional for much of her career. Had there previously consulted medical businesses on integrating health and wellness, nutritionals novel, and advanced testing medical devices and cellular therapies.
1 (3m 49s):
In early 2019, Heather became the host of please meet face-to-face series intimate interviews with the innovators and educators of sexual wellness and pleasure. You can find her on Twitter at H C Montgomery 2 0 1. So Heather, how has online censorship effected users of social media and businesses in the adult industry?
2 (4m 15s):
Boy, Bruce, how hasn't it? I mean, every day we're hearing more and more stories about people that are losing their channels completely. They're getting just deleted. And of course they're censoring their content by either removing posts completely and saying it's sexual solicitation, which we got for putting a meme up about the Australian kiss and, and, and in a bathing suit in one picture, you know, a one piece bathing suit, we got re you know, deleted because they said it was sexual solicitation, which is just ridiculous. But more importantly, I think what people really need to pay attention to is that how many followers do you have and how many of those followers are actually seeing your posts?
2 (5m 0s):
Because when we dial it back, even our own followers are only getting to see two to 3% of them are seeing our posts. So how is that happening? Right? Why are they not seeing our posts? So why
1 (5m 15s):
Posts, you know,
2 (5m 17s):
Like why posts? We stopped posting on Instagram, unless it's like a big holiday, or we have an interview that we're letting everybody know is now live, that's it? What do we do about that? Well, I mean, it really, it really depends on your business model as, as far as where are you advertising and marketing? I mean, right now they're, they're the big player, right? Everybody wants to be able to advertise and market on Instagram, but unfortunately we can't advertise there either. They won't take our advertising dollar. So you really have to be creative. I would say, make every best effort that you can to get your email list out of your followers.
2 (5m 59s):
Meaning number one, you have a way to contact them. If God forbid, they do decide to cut you off. And then, you know, obviously please meet.com. We designed that to celebrate sexuality and to be a social media platform where people could be able to interact. And when I say people, I mean, users who are learning and want to know about sex and sexuality, and they have anonymity now. Right. So, which is great because even if I did like, somebody's content on Facebook or Instagram, that was about sexual nature, I probably wasn't going to share it. Yeah. Right. Cause grandma was watching.
2 (6m 39s):
And so when my kids and my niece curious, right. And so we see very little social sharing in our
1 (6m 46s):
Industry. Wait, wait a minute, wait a minute. Your grandma isn't on, please. Me.
2 (6m 50s):
No, she is. She may, she's a hundred, but I mean, she doesn't know my anonymous profile. I mean, I have my public one for my channel, my, my brand of who I am, but then I still have actually, I have three anonymous profiles on please me because, you know, I like to dabble in all the worlds. So I have three because I just have different personas for me. It's a way of playing. If I will. You will. You know, when I went on my BDSM, I put my go into my PTSM hat and then I go chat with my BDSM people. And when I want to talk about feminine and divine, feminine energy and tantra, I go in with my tantra identity, you know?
2 (7m 31s):
So, so that's, that's kind of how I see it. But, but this allows obviously brands and thought leaders to talk about sex freely, not worrying about getting deleted or their accounts getting deleted. We re we boost their posts instead of suppressing them, because we're looking for that content to introduce our members too, because that's why they're here. And so do we have the number of members that Facebook has? No. So we're not, we're not the, the short, short term solution of how do they get the eyeballs, you know, tomorrow, because we're still growing. We don't have the 200 billion members that Facebook has not yet robust, but we'll get there.
2 (8m 16s):
But, but, but what it is is it is the place where they can tell their current followers, Hey, I can't post this stuff over here anymore. So if you want my more deeper, meaningful, sexier, fun content, then come follow my please meet channel because we're not going to delete our Facebook accounts because what you do on, please me is not what you do on Facebook, right? So it's not a con it's not a competition. Right. And then, so this is just the place you go to play and have some fun and learn and expand your sexuality. So it's complimentary not, not competition, if that makes sense. So
1 (8m 55s):
Three profiles. Hmm. A little bit of a split personality there. I love it. I love it. You know, I heard recently the European branch of the free speech coalition is petitioning. I don't know what body it is in the EU. They're coming up with some kind of internet law and they're, they're, they're petitioning against censorship for the sexual industry.
2 (9m 24s):
Great. I'd love to get right on board with that and post it all over, please me and tell all 420 channels about it so they can get on board. I mean, this is what we're passionate about. I'm a huge advocate for free speech. I think it's very important to have both sides of an argument be heard. And I say argument, but discussion. I mean, thought process. And, and when we it's, it's important for innovation, it's important for education. It's important for development of anything ma that matters, right? So can't stand to see this, this, this violation of our rights, especially in this country where we have them.
2 (10m 4s):
Yeah. Supposedly that's a, yeah, that's a,
1 (10m 7s):
That's what the constitution says, how it's being carried out as another is another matter. So how has marketing changed for the adult industry since foster sistah was passed?
2 (10m 20s):
Let's be fair. I mean, we've always had censorship, right? Where we've been treated like the redheaded stepchild for a long time. However, what happened in 2018 is that the protection of well, which is all we all the, all the rage right now is to talk about, you know, this act from 1984 that we've had that protects indemnifies internet providers from the activity of their members. Right. It allows us to be able to provide technology so people can use it because we can't be responsible for every single person on our platform and what they do. Right. That's what the communications act, right. Section 2, 3, 4 is all about, but what foster assessed it did is it said, okay, yes, you have protection 2, 3, 4 for everything.
2 (11m 6s):
Except if there's anything that's going on and they put it under the human trafficking, we're doing this to stop human trafficking, which by the way, I am a huge abolitionists for sex trafficking. And we shouldn't pass the stop. It's the third fastest growing criminal enterprise in the world. And we still have slavery and it's called sex trafficking. Right? So we want to talk about racism. Well, let's end slavery first, come on. People. We still have slaves running around. Right. So let's get to that. And so I think it's important that we do tackle that subject and find a way to do it. But what they did was lumped in prostitution into the law and said, if you're doing anything that like marketing prostitution or advertising any sex work and, or have anybody being sex trafficked and, or have any child pornography, which I agree, we should not have child pornography.
2 (12m 4s):
We should not have people being sex trafficked online. And it's, it's, it is bad, but it removed those, those safeguards from 2, 3, 4. And so
1 (12m 14s):
Now by the way, two, three, oh,
2 (12m 17s):
And so now two 30 section 2 36,
1 (12m 21s):
Don't worry about it. Yeah, I know. I know. And I asked I, and I asked you to, I asked you to do this at eight in the morning. So I it's that's, that's my fault. I'm sure. You know what it is.
2 (12m 32s):
Yes. And so at any rate, those, those protections are no longer there. So now people are criminal. The people that own, these companies are not only civilly or criminally liable, but also civilly liable. So anybody can Sue anybody for anything these days and you have to then defend yourself in a court of law. And so, and then there's and they do. And then there's of course the civil part or the criminal part, which not only can you be fined, but you can face jail time. Right? So it's, it's a serious and scary thing. Right? And there's the added problem of these platforms have 13 year olds and up on them, right.
2 (13m 13s):
Facebook and all these other platforms have allow their members to be 13 years of older. So the reason why the, the increase in censorship, especially on, well, let's just say on sex and sexuality, cause there's other censorship going on right now, too. But that particular censorship started in April and we saw it. We've seen it roll out. We've seen Tumblr Tumblr say no longer handling adult content, right? That's the first big Lego to fall or domino to fall. And then we started seeing the revision to terms and service and the deletion of posts and the deletions of accounts left and right.
2 (13m 54s):
And the introduction of AI algorithms to help them try to get rid of some of this content, but the problem that they face. And, and I don't, I don't try to bill Annise them because there are real problems that they face. And I don't know that the, I don't think they want to suppress sexual content and maybe they do, but, but I, I would bet that they probably don't. I think they're just doing it for, to, you know, they, they
1 (14m 20s):
Have, they want to
2 (14m 22s):
Cover their ass, but they also have big advertisers that say, Hey, if you're allowing advertising or you're being associated with this, this, this, and this, and we're not going to spend our money with you. Right. But I think, I think Facebook is pretty big now. I think they could probably tell everybody to bugger off if they wanted to, you don't want to spend your dollars, your dope, the block, where are you going to get better ROI and a bigger pool of people. So I think it's more about the cover, your ass thing.
1 (14m 49s):
Don't talk to me about Facebook. I can't even post, like on any of my, on any of my accounts because of their stupid AI over me over me, wishing a friend happy birthday. Okay. So I've, I've, I've, I've deleted Facebook on all my devices just to let you know.
2 (15m 5s):
Yeah, me too. I didn't even load it on my new phone because I just don't even want to go there. It's not even, I haven't been deleted. It's just like, I just don't even want it. I just don't. I'm done well. And when you talk, when you
1 (15m 15s):
Talk about the whole sex trafficking thing, which was supposed to be the reason for all this, and I, I blame the politicians who sponsored it, not gonna mention any names, but ones in the ones in the white house, you know, it's supposed to cut down on sex trafficking and not only did it not cut down on sex trafficking, it made sex trafficking worse because right now, law enforcement doesn't have those escort sites to find the sex traffickers and entrap them. But at the same time, it's made sex workers unsafe because they can't vet Johns. And a lot of them have been driven to the streets.
1 (15m 55s):
So now there's, this law stinks from top to bottom. And I think eventually I hope eventually it's abolished. I expect to see a Supreme court challenge of it at some point where that goes, God knows, but we won't, we won't get into that.
2 (16m 14s):
Yeah. Yup. No, I mean, it's, it's, you know, the people that make the laws sometimes, obviously, as we all have experienced, clearly don't think no,
1 (16m 27s):
No, stop there. Stop. There don't think exactly. They don't
2 (16m 31s):
Think like, how is this going to affect everything else? And are we really putting together good letters, legislation that has a chance of actually really solving this problem? And so I don't, you
1 (16m 42s):
Know, no, no, it wasn't there. I didn't
2 (16m 44s):
Do it. But I, I agree with you that it's had a horrendous effect and I mean, it's visible world war. I mean, it's huge. Well,
1 (16m 55s):
Speaking of nothing, we're recording this the day after a prominent Republican Republican Congressman from your state has been, has been charged with a sex with a 14 year old girls. So there ya go. And that they could be punished to the nth degree of the law. If it's true. I won't mention his name, Matt Goetz. Anyway. So how are you different from other platforms that support adult content like safety?
2 (17m 26s):
Yeah, I mean, so number one, obviously we started building the top technology in 2018 and we've been working on it every single day since, and we will continue to evolve the technology as we, this is what we call an MVP a, which stands for minimum viable product, but it's a souped up. It's a very well-functioning MVP, but I say it that because there's so many things I want it to be able to do. Yeah. Eventually put on a VR headset and walk inside one of the seven worlds of please meet for example, but that's a little bit further down the line. Yeah. So I think one of the primary ways that we're different than FetLife is from, from what I understand. And I went on it briefly and I talked to a lot of people that are on it.
2 (18m 10s):
They haven't really done much with the technology in the last five or 10 years, however long they've been around. I don't think, yeah. I don't think they, they up there, their software and make changes. Right? So it's, it's really, labor is really a community, which we will be too, but we're more of a technology company, right? We're going to continue to innovate. We're going to continue to expand. We're going to continue to add FinTech for our industry. We're going to be doing. And when I say for our industry, I think the difference also too, between FetLife and us is they're very specific obviously to the ESM. Whereas we are sexual wellness and pleasure across the board. I wanted everyone to be able to feel like they have a place where they can have resources for their sex sexuality, regardless of their preference.
2 (18m 58s):
Because when I want to do explore, I wanted to go onto FetLife because I was kind of curious about media semi hadn't had any experience with it yet, but it was just a little too scary. And what I mean by that is too much unknown. And I felt like I'm, I'm going to be this newbie and I'm going to, I didn't, you know, I'm going to go on and everybody's going to be like, wow, what I was talking about. I didn't know what to expect. And you know, already it's that control versus submission and paying for pleasure. So it was kind of like a little scary anyway, you know, in your mind, of course, it's not right. We know this if you've been involved in it, but when you're, when you haven't, you don't know that.
2 (19m 41s):
So I don't know. I don't know
1 (19m 43s):
If you've sat through a taping of one of kink dot comes, BDSM scenes like I have. And I brought my, and I brought my, a very innocent Tai Tai girlfriend at the time who became my wife to the party. It was a, it was at the kink castle, which no longer exists in San Francisco. Oh, it scared me.
2 (20m 6s):
Yeah. Well that's what I was worried about for like two days. And I'm like, oh, and it was dark and it was black. And it was, you know, the software inside of it even felt like a little, like, I feel scared, but I know people love FetLife. And I don't mean, and I only mean to put it down because it's a great community. And I know that people have been on there for a long time and they are able to connect with one another. And I think it's great. I think it's wonderful. So yeah, we're very, we're very similar in the sense that it's a community where you can, we're more like Facebook.
2 (20m 46s):
I mean, we like them very much, but from a functionality standpoint where businesses have business pages, people have personal accounts, you can follow people, you can follow businesses, they show up in your feed, they can post an article. I used,
1 (21m 0s):
I used to have, I used to have all that Facebook.
2 (21m 5s):
Right, exactly. So, and I think that life isn't, isn't designed that way. Right, right, right, right. There's different places you can go and there's different things you can do. And there's people you can connect with. And there's a bit, you know, like we're, we're much more, we have that similar feel, I guess, to, to play, but that's where it ends. Right. Right. We have seven worlds and there's also places you can go and explore and there's going to be events, calendars and things like that. Sexy travel, which of course, COVID-19 kind of put up those two channels on hold. Well, there's nobody doing anything.
1 (21m 40s):
Right, right, right. Exactly. But
2 (21m 43s):
Yeah, that, that's what we do. And that's what, we're what we're all about. And I think sites like FetLife and all the others, we're an aggregator of content. And so they should all have channels and let their people,
1 (21m 56s):
I was going to say, I was going to say that, that you should be partnering with these people.
2 (22m 1s):
Well, I mean, I don't have to partner. They have the technology, they can use it. Meaning we'll gladly. That's what we designed it for. I guess always partners. But my point being, we don't even need to make an agreement it's there. Right. It's there. And if you're putting out great content and being a leader in your thought area, then we're going to promote your content because we want to get people the best of the best and have them coming back to please me for more. So, I mean, eventually right when we're, we're a little bit further down the road this year, we'll have the self administered advertising tools. Our industry can finally advertise. Right. But we need to raise the number of members first. Right. So where you have that chicken and the egg situation too.
2 (22m 43s):
So I understand so very, very shortly, we'll have a whole ecosystem where we can have payment processing and cryptocurrency and screw the banks and processors that try to Jack us up to sex seven, eight, 10%, you know, fees, and then sell us. We're not going to do business with you anymore. So we're looking to provide the technology solutions to marketing and businesses, challenge challenges, and make it easy for people. I mean, I really built it for me. Right. Like, but if I'm going to build it, then I want it to be good. Right. But really make it easy for people to take this area of their life and make sure that it is positive and not negative.
2 (23m 27s):
Right. Whether that's because of trauma or whether that's because of heartbreak or whether that's because of lack of skill or, you know, whatever their hang ups and problems are around sex and sexuality, let's get to the bottom of it. So you can get to living more pleasurable life, you know, and if you have a pleasurable life and you're like, well, this has gotten really good. I'd like to make it better. Well then let's give you some more tools to take it to extraordinary. You know? So that's, that's really what it's meant to do. And it takes art. It takes an army for that. Absolutely.
1 (24m 0s):
So what does pleased me's mix of users like,
2 (24m 4s):
Oh my goodness. So it's so interesting. We love being a data comm data company. We get to learn so much about ourselves and that's another thing I'm on it. We're very dedicated to is creating like the Watson, the AI de identified data of sex and sexuality, right. So I came from health and wellness. You mentioned it. And I think so we, we, we treat every member like a patient, meaning like we treat it like a HIPAA situation where their information is their private information. And so anything that goes into the database goes on a number with, with, with a profile, meaning it's a woman between the ages of 20 and 29.
2 (24m 48s):
Who's single and her name is nowhere near it. Right? And so it's not tied or their identity. And so we're going to continue to collect cool and inf informational stuff. But right now, what we know is that 62% of the people on the site are women. 32% are men. That is by design. When we spend our marketing dollars and target our target user is a woman between the ages of 25 and 55 who likes dating and who's single and who loves love, interested in love and sexuality and astrology, for example, you know, like is one per persona. And we have the ladies, same mentality.
2 (25m 28s):
If the leaders are there, the guys will come and it's been working beautifully. We've never not spent one dime to get the, the guys that are on the site. And we wanted that to be that ratio because I wanted women to feel comfortable. And like, you know, if you've ever walked into a bar and there's like seven guys to one girl, it's not fun too many times, too many, too much testosterone in the room. Like, no, no, no. I'm just like just, it's just not fun. So I wanted them to feel, you know, I always wanted to feel women heavy.
1 (26m 2s):
Hey, it can be, it can be kind of fun if you're, if you're a female and want free drinks.
2 (26m 8s):
Well, yeah. But how many can you drink and
1 (26m 14s):
Where are you going after that? That would be, that would be home
2 (26m 17s):
With seven guys. Apparently. Oops,
1 (26m 20s):
I is, is that one of your personas anyway? So, so how are you able to support the industry's need for advertising in a social media setting?
2 (26m 31s):
Well, I mean, number one, we're 21 and over right. It's an adult social media platform. So that's the reason why, where we're saying we freed the nipple and you know, you can post and eventually some of the tools will allow members to rate photos. Are they X? Are they double X? So they triple X. And then if people want to put filters on their feet and saying, I don't want to see anything that's this or that. Right. So that people are getting what they want and not what they don't want. That's one thing. So, and the other thing is we don't think there's anything wrong with advertising, sex and sexuality. There really, there really are no laws that people are breaking.
2 (27m 14s):
Like why Facebook or Instagram or Tik TOK or Snapchat or Pinterest refuses to take our advertising dollars. That please me is beyond me. Like, it doesn't make any sense to me. Nope. We're not selling sex. You know, meaning we're not, I'm not a prostitute. Not that there's anything wrong, I'm not knocking sex work. But if this is the law we're talking about, we're saying we can't do it because it's in violation of FOS assessed to, and we're going to go to jail. We're going to pay fines that we're going to get civilly sued. Right. So I'm not that. So I don't know what the problem is there, but they all call us. It's the end, the end, the destination URL.
1 (27m 54s):
Oh, it's their terms and conditions, which goes for, oh, so many different businesses in mainstream that, that ban our industry. And man, it just never ends email platforms and banks. And you can just go on and on and on. So how do you, how do you appeal to people of all sexual preferences?
2 (28m 18s):
I mean, it's really quite simple. It's about pleasing me. You know, the, the site's name is pleased me. Right. And we give them an analysis so that they can put in their preferences of what they like in bed. That way we have a world we can put them into. Right. Do you want to do like really very traditional and don't really venture outside the bedroom, not interested in bringing in any, any pain for pleasure or restriction or role-play well then you're, they're going to be an Alara right. With other people who are also interested in those things in bed. Right? So that way, when you have a question you don't want to use, we don't just judge each other for having sex.
2 (29m 0s):
We kind of judge each other for the way we have sex. Somebody to say to a masochistic may say to somebody who Alara, which is technically the term they call it vanilla. The vanilla person might say, well, you're weird. And the Triton person might say, well, you're boring. Right.
1 (29m 16s):
You know what I mean? They all would say that, but anyway. Right. So why put the Triton
2 (29m 22s):
And the Alara in the same world that you w
1 (29m 25s):
I don't know, it might be fun. Well,
2 (29m 28s):
Guess what? They can visit each other's world if they want to. Right. But my point being, I wanted people to
1 (29m 35s):
Have freedom. Hey, Hey, you asked why. So that was, that was my answer.
2 (29m 40s):
It could be fun. Right. And they convince it. But yeah, we wanted people to feel free to ask the questions and not worry about people around judging, even though we're anonymous. Sometimes we still take on some judgment when somebody says something to us. Right. It doesn't matter what our name is. It's we hear it. Right. And so I just, I really want people to feel safe. And then the content of course, for those were worlds is curated to be applicable to those worlds. So in a Laura, you're not going to see any BDSM content, right. Because they may not even want to see that, that might turn them off. That may scare them. That may go, I didn't want it. I'm not even coming on the site, if I'm going to see that kind of stuff. Right. And so, and they ha they're entitled to that.
2 (30m 21s):
Right? It's their sex and their sexuality, and it should be their journey and they should enjoy the however they want to. Amen. Yeah. And so that's, that's really how it was important to me that we could appeal to everyone. I thought, well, that would really suck if this tool is only available for some people and not all because we're all sexual beings. So we worked really hard to figure out a way to include the inclusivity and diversity. And we want to have these conversations. I'm doing a 14 video series right now on all the areas that I feel please, me as the power to do some real good and social reform. And one of them is just, you know, violence, hate crimes and racism.
2 (31m 6s):
It's like, you know what, it's great about these meat. You go into a world, you're an avatar and a screen name. You can pick any avatar. You can be an animal, you can get smiley face. You can be whatever you want. And you're really don't know who you're talking to. If your friend, you know, friending people and chatting up and making comments and topic rooms, and you don't know their color, their age, their age, you know, none of it, you just know what they have to say. Right. And so we're getting to know one another, we're hearing one another with that other two or three senses nullify. Oh, wouldn't
1 (31m 37s):
It be great. Wouldn't it be great if politics were like that?
2 (31m 43s):
You know? And so how do we, how do we, how do we end racism? I mean, one thing I think is that you just, when you finally have a friend that's of a race that maybe you didn't understand, or you had a preconceived notion about, and then you got to be friends with that person, then you realize how wonderful they are. And why was I so scared of that race for so long? And like, now I get mad if somebody is going to talk badly to my friend at that rate, because I have an understanding now, and I have accepted that, they're just the same as me. And I think the more that we have that ability to identify and learn from one other, where are we going to learn from one another? If we're segregated. I
1 (32m 21s):
Agree. I agree. And we are as Americans, we most certainly are. Unfortunately
2 (32m 30s):
Only America has more of a Mecca of, of religions than a lot of other countries.
1 (32m 36s):
Yes. Yes. Well, it's per it's permissive. It's right.
2 (32m 40s):
Yeah. I mean, we have more people here, but, but we just, but we just tend to community-wise them Lincoln air, you know, like people still kind of segment inside America. Right. But we got the people there here of all different races, you know? Cause everybody wants to come to America because it's a
1 (33m 1s):
Great country. That's what makes the cut. That's what makes the country great. So why is prime? I can talk. Why is privacy important for your channels and members?
2 (33m 13s):
Well, listen, we're not having sex in the middle of a restaurant for a reason. That's because sex is a private enterprise, right. You know, I mean, there's people that go to sex parties and they're into orgies and they like threesomes and foursomes and puppy pals and twosomes. And that's wonderful and great. And I'm not judging them. I'm just saying for most people, sex is a private enterprise. It's something that's done between two people who have interviewed each other and tested each other out and dated. And then they've decided, okay, now I'm going to be intimate with this person and in many cases, right. And then they do it where no one's looking right. There's a reason for that. Right.
2 (33m 53s):
Because we're taking on with all her clothes for being completely, you know, vulnerable and intimate and this and that. And so why would we go out on a public platform and start talking about that private enterprise is between me and another person, even if I'm comfortable with it. And somebody knows who my boyfriend or husband is. And I start talking about our sex on Facebook, I'm violating consent. Did he give me consent to talk about the fact that I like, let's just say I'm just using as an example because people have fears around it. But let's say I'm started talking about the fact that we were curious about pegging and I wanted to peg him and he let me, and now he, and I'm, and I'm making this story up, but I'm just using it as an example because people, you know, that is a real fear that guys have.
2 (34m 38s):
If somebody hears, I got pegged, they're going to think I'm gay, which there's nothing wrong with being gay, but in their mind, they just don't want the wrong identity. That's not who they are being associated with them. Right. And so if I start talking about that on Facebook, he just got violated
1 (34m 54s):
His consent. Oh boy,
2 (34m 57s):
Totally. Right. Like he didn't, why would you say that on Facebook and everybody here? And that, that's my, why
1 (35m 2s):
Does so many people say private things on Facebook? I know, I know, I know married couples that have private conversations on Facebook. I'm like, why,
2 (35m 12s):
Why, why? So? Right. So if you're exploring and, or learning and, or healing and, or just entertaining yourself privately, or it should be, it means you should at least have the option for it to be privately. Correct. Because it is a private enterprise. And then number two, maybe I don't know what I like yet because I'm exploring. And maybe I would be willing to come out, say a little bit more publicly about sex and sexuality once I know. And I'm clear that that's how I feel and I'm not ashamed to say it. Sure. But while I'm exploring, I don't really know how I feel.
1 (35m 50s):
Right. Right. Yeah. Especially for younger people, especially for younger people who don't have a lot of experience. So what problems have you solved for sexual wellness and pleasure brands with your platform?
2 (36m 3s):
Social sharing is a big problem. Meaning people won't share their content because they don't want people to see them sharing sexual content. Sure. That's a huge problem advertising. That's another problem we're solving eventually say eventually the product isn't ready for use yet, but financial tech to process payments and save them money and fees is another problem that we're saving. I think just the not being able to be their brand is a problem. You know, in the marketplace, they can't even really put out the information they want and say the things in the put the images that they would prefer to use to celebrate sexuality because they get censored everywhere.
2 (36m 47s):
So we've, we've opened up in the creativity box of, Hey, write the articles you want, use the images you want. You know, and another problem we've solved is, you know, when, when they do advertise, if you write an article, right, it's about a dildo and how great it is, you have the ability and please me to choose what worlds you're posting that article to. And if I want to, I can put a different image at the head of that article for Alara that when I told you about the three vanilla and I can put a totally different image for the one, that's either Vega, Triton or Janus, that's more BDSM focus. So now that same piece of content actually can appeal and th the user can go, oh, I see myself there.
2 (37m 33s):
Look at that BDSM person. Let me read this sex toy. They care about BDSM people. Yeah. Right. And so it really allows marketing teams to get creative and use one piece of content and just change the imagery to match the user personas better. Nice.
1 (37m 52s):
So how many business channels have set up please? Me accounts
2 (37m 56s):
Last I checked, which was, I believe last week. It's 425. Geez. That's great. Yeah. Some of the big names, I mean, you know, Dame products, Laura DeCarlo lust three adult time are so many, I hate to just pull out names because there's so many there's broadcasters, there's erotic writers. There's ASM, Mar artists there's, you know, just personal artists, people that are porn stars or cam girls. There's just, there's so many, I mean, there's too many events, too many dementia, but lots of big ones.
1 (38m 34s):
That's awesome. So who's your, so if you had your choice, if, if you, do you have a, like a wishlist of brands and companies that aren't there yet? All of them
2 (38m 47s):
Seriously. I mean, like really all of them, because I want our, our, our members to have a plethora, but yes, I'd love to see Esther Perel have a channel. I think she's amazing and has such great content. We can still post her content cause she's got a lot of free content on YouTube. So we do, because I value her thought leadership, but love to have her energy in the platform. We've got Dr. Ava codel and Lori handlers who are two dynamos that have been in this industry, teaching and educating on sex and sexual wellness for 30 years each. So we've got a lot of really great
1 (39m 24s):
Thought. Yes. But do you have Dr. Ruth?
2 (39m 30s):
Oh my God. The Playboy club in New York, right before COVID-19 happened in my friend. Robbie's birthday party and boy, my God, she's short. She let little pipsqueak party til 12 o'clock at night with us.
1 (39m 43s):
She's gotta be, she's gotta be 150 by
2 (39m 45s):
Now, 92. And she just launched a new book, lasts like eight or nine months. Yeah. Yeah.
1 (39m 54s):
Have you ever heard, you ever heard Sam Kinisons material on her? No. You ever heard Sam? I love Sam kidding. After we're done. You need to Google Sam. Kinison Dr. Ruth, and he will you'll fall out of your chair. Oh my God. I'm totally doing that. It's going to be awesome. You'll love it. So what do you hope to accomplish with policemen?
2 (40m 17s):
You know, I mean, I want to increase the world's happiness quotient. It's just that simple. I really feel like when sex and relationships have such a huge impact on our overall health and wellbeing. When I worked in the medical community, I was like working on the physical side, right. The cellular therapies, the nutrition, the weight loss that you know, how to live healthier, longer, better quality of life. Right. Sure, sure. What I learned really quickly was that people, no matter how healthy I got them physically, if they were emotionally unwell and or if they were, and this completely applied to my life too, if I was having negative energy coming from my relationship sector and from sex and sexuality, because I did, I was, I wasn't, I was very repressed, sexually growing up.
2 (41m 5s):
My family was really religious and I lived in the Midwest and, you know, I had a couple early sexual traumas from the age of five on, so I didn't buy a vibrator till I was like 36, you know, like, I didn't know how to have an orgasm my myself until 38, you know? So it was definitely a lot of shame, a lot of unsatisfying sex, a lot of fights, a lot of two divorces to get, you know, then I was like, something's got to give it's to change. And the only person that could do that was me. You know what I mean? And so I really just hope that people understand the importance that this area of our life really has and how it spills over into everything else.
2 (41m 51s):
And when you realize that and take a little accountability and say, well, it's not great, but I can make a great if I just get some information education and put some time into it, then I think we can have a more productive society. I think we can have less crime. I think we can end cycles of abuse. I think we can put a big dent in child sex trafficking. I think there's so many different things. Gender equality, you know, racism, hate crimes. I mean, let's, let's get together and take the steps that we can with the man and the woman in the mirror to be contributing positively to this part of our lives in the world.
2 (42m 32s):
And that's really how you tackle these things is you can't force somebody to not be a racist. No, you just can't. You can, you can, you can, you can litigate and legislate and write it and do this and do that. But you can't change people's hearts and as they want to change their heart, you know, so, so how do we do that? And it's by giving them tools and access and, you know, integrating and integrating.
1 (42m 59s):
I agree. I could not agree more. Well, Heather, I'd like to thank you for being our guest today on adult side broker talk. And I hope we'll get a chance to do this again really soon.
2 (43m 9s):
Thank you, Bruce. It was so much fun. I really enjoyed being here and I loved meeting you too. And I hope that you're doing well over there in Thailand.
1 (43m 16s):
Yeah. I hope we'll get a chance to meet in person soon.
2 (43m 20s):
I'm sure we will. My broker
0 (43m 22s):
Tip today is part six of how to buy an adult website. Last week, we talked about the sales agreement. So now both of you have signed the agreement. What comes next? There needs to be an escrow setup where you send the money, whether it be a one-time payment or a deposit. If you're going to be making payments, this has done about half the time. These days, the seller for their part puts the assets of the sale into escrow, namely the domains being sold and any other tangible assets, it can be put into escrow. Your attorney can give you more information on that. We recommend escrow.domains for escrows. They are from out of Washington, DC. And no, they're not paying me to say this. I just use them, trust them.
0 (44m 3s):
And I'm delighted by the work they've done for us. Either an escrow agreement will be drawn up by them in the case of a customer list grow. Or if it's a simple one, it can be set up on their website. Then you, the buyer, the seller and the broker will be contacted by escrow domains with further instructions, such as wiring information, the escrow is opened and either the deal closes within a matter of few days or an inspection period is allowed. It all depends on what the agreement calls for, whether you need an inspection period. Really depends on the weather. There is still some information you need to find out prior to the deal, closing your broker and your attorney can advise you more on this. And this is on a case by case basis.
0 (44m 44s):
Then the money is transferred as are the domains and the deal is closed. Now in many cases, in fact, most of the time, the seller either stays on board for a period of time to help with the transition, or is at least available on a call basis to answer questions. This is something most buyers should ask for, but at this point, you pretty much own the website. What do you do now? We'll talk more about that next week. And next week we'll be talking to Matthew Bennett, the English Leather Master. You don't want to miss that. And that's it on this week's Adult Site Broker Talk. I'd once again like to thank our guest Heather Montgomery. Talk to you next week on Adult Site Broker Talk. I'm Bruce Friedman.